Relationships are mirrors
Bertrand Russel said “A stupid man’s report of what a clever man said can never be accurate, because he unconsciously translates what he hears into something he can understand.”
When I judge others – better, smarter, cooler, more successful – I try to remember that I’m acting like Russel’s stupid man.
After all, I don’t really experience the other person, just my perceptions of them, entirely inside my own head.
When we realize that our relationships are just mirrors, we can see other people as a way to help us understand more about why we sometimes react instead of respond.
Things that annoy us in others are usually the things we don’t want inside ourselves, so we reject them.
The things we admire in others are often things we want for ourselves, which is why we’re attracted to them.
Next time someone makes you feel strongly—whether in a good or bad way—ask yourself, "What does this tell me…not about them…but about myself?"
Instead of reacting, take it as a chance to learn more about what you need, so you can respond with intention.
What do you see in your mirrors?
